Chapter 05

In her senior year of high school, Tang Yi did not have an easy time. Her grades were average, and even if she worked hard, she would only have a chance to get into a decent university.

Tang Yi’s parents did not have high expectations for her. They originally only hoped that she would study at a regular undergraduate program near their hometown. Unexpectedly, Tang Yi performed exceptionally well in the college entrance exam and was admitted to the School of Journalism at Shaanxi Normal University.

It was the end of July when she went back to her former high school to get the admission notice. In the evening, Tang Yi stopped in front of the honor roll of the previous year’s college entrance exam posted at the school gate.

Over the past year, she had always hurried past this place without stopping, but without anyone telling her, she could accurately recite Jiang Qiaosheng’s ranking and the university he was admitted to.

That summer when her junior year was about to end, Tang Yi suddenly woke up from her dream. She no longer cared about Jiang Qiaosheng’s affairs, and even made excuses to say goodbye to the game and never logged in again.

It’s just that Jiang Qiaosheng was really too outstanding. Even after he graduated and left school, his name would still appear in the casual chats of the girls.

At the 100-day oath-taking assembly of the senior class, the school originally planned to invite Jiang Qiaosheng to come back and give a speech to the younger students, but later, for some reason, the one who came was Wen Jing, who went to the same university as him.

Tang Yi was not unfamiliar with her.

In the countless stories that belong to Jiang Qiaosheng, the name Wen Jing has never been absent.

That day, the sky was clear, and Tang Yi stood in the crowd, suddenly remembering the night in the alley, when the girl leaned on Jiang Qiaosheng’s back and said,

“I will definitely make a game that will sweep across China with Jiang Qiaosheng in the future.”

The wind blew from a distant place, and Tang Yi suddenly felt a little sad.

She and Jiang Qiaosheng were like two different paths.

She didn’t even have the qualification to fight alongside him.

No.

Perhaps it had once been there.

She just missed it, missed the only chance to turn everything into reality.

From school to home, it was a very short distance.

Tang Yi walked through the alley, passing the Internet cafe where she had first met Jiang Qiaosheng, and she went in and randomly found a computer in the corner.

Tang Sheng’s account has not been logged in for a year.

Tang Yi entered the account, entered the password, and clicked on the login, but the system prompted that the account password was incorrect.

She looked at the keyboard and the screen, and entered it again.

It still showed that the account password was incorrect.

The dim light of the screen reflected Tang Yi’s somewhat dazed expression.

It turned out that the farewell she had casually said with Tang Sheng’s identity was the last connection between her and Jiang Qiaosheng.

Tang Yi did not retrieve the password.

This account was just borrowed by her, just like the time when Tang Sheng and Qiao Fu, which she also borrowed with a mask.

Qiao Fu and Jiang Qiaosheng never belonged to Tang Yi at any time.

As she walked out of the Internet cafe, the night fell.

Tang Yi walked to the familiar street, and it seemed that she had returned to that summer night a year ago, when the boy carried the girl and walked past here.

Just this once.

She did not stand in place, but walked from the gloomy alley into the crowd under the starlight, walking in the opposite direction from them.

Tang Yi kept walking forward.

The noisy streets, the bustling traffic, she didn’t look back, until she walked out of his seventeen years.

–

During the four years in university, Tang Yi lived a comfortable life, she was not a very introverted person, and gradually made many friends.

She would occasionally open the game.

It’s just that the name on top of her head was no longer Tang Sheng.

In the second semester of freshman year, Tang Yi’s roommate Chen Jiahe secretly liked a boy, and started to get into the game “The Legend” because of him.

Tang Yi played it with her a few times, and later never mentioned the idea of teaching her to play the game.

Chen Jiahe was persistent: “Tangtang, just do me a favor! Otherwise, with my lousy skills, he definitely won’t take me to play with him.”

Tang Yi was annoyed by her nagging, but she finally compromised: “It’s not that I want to help you, it’s because I’m merciful.”

Chen Jiahe: “……..”

It was probably the power of true love, with Tang Yi’s help, Chen Jiahe gradually got the hang of it, and her relationship with the object of her secret love also became closer and closer.

Later, there was a power outage in the dormitory, and she accompanied Chen Jiahe to the Internet cafe to grind levels.

That day, the weather in Xi’an was not very good, gloomy, with the signs of wind and rain coming. By the time they were done, sure enough, it started pouring.

Tang Yi and Chen Jiahe took shelter from the rain under the eaves.

The plastic curtain on the side was lifted, and a few boys came out from inside, one after another running out into the heavy rain, with only the last one left.

Tang Yi turned her head to look.

The boy was standing neatly in the area not getting rained on, not feeling enthusiastic about his friends’ hot-blooded behavior of running out in the rain, and even had a hint of subtle disdain.

Apparently noticing someone’s gaze, he unexpectedly turned his eyes.

Tang Yi was caught red-handed. She pretended to be calm and pulled Chen Jiahe to the side by a couple of steps, and after thinking about it, she found it somewhat amusing for some reason.

Chen Jiahe finished sending a message to her crush and asked, “What are you laughing at?”

Tang Yi shook her head: “Nothing.”

The next time they met was at the entrance of the school library.

It was also a rainy day that day.

Tang Yi waited for Chen Jiahe to bring an umbrella, and when the boy came out of the library and was about to leave with the umbrella, he turned back and looked at her.

Tang Yi was stunned for a moment, not recognizing him at the time, only feeling that he looked familiar.

Later, on one of the days they were together, Tang Yi learned that during the few times she accompanied Chen Jiahe to the Internet cafe, Li Bochuan had encountered her twice.

The third time was at the entrance, taking shelter from the rain.

The fourth time was at the library.

The Fifth Time.

It was Tang Yi who invited him to dinner and thanked him for escorting her back to the dormitory that day in the library.

After that, there were many more interactions back and forth.

The idea of being together was brought up by Li Bochuan, who was a year older than Tang Yi, a typical science and engineering guy, not so romantic, with a very straightforward personality.

His love talk was like giving a technical report.

“Phenethylamine is an organic compound with the molecular formula C8H11N. It is sensitive to air, hygroscopic, immiscible with water, with a boiling point of 184~186°C and a relative density of 0.950 and a refractive index of 1.5260.”

Tang Yi felt dizzy listening to this.

Li Bochuan continued: “But in the field of love, phenethylamine is abbreviated as PEA and is called the love hormone. PEA is a stimulant, and due to the effect of PEA, a person’s breathing and heart rate will accelerate, and the dilation of the pupils is the best standard to judge whether it is true love or perfunctory, when the brain produces enough PEA, it also means the emergence of love.”

Hearing this, Tang Yi finally understood that the young man’s complex and awkward words were just his sincere heart.

During the two years that Tang Yi and Li Bochuan were together, they were very happy, with little quarreling, and no different from all ordinary couples in the world.

They also face all the problems that ordinary couples cannot ignore.

——Graduation season.

Li Bochuan came to Shaanxi Normal University after failing the college entrance examination, and went to Peking University for postgraduate study in his senior year.

He is a northerner, from a well-off family, and his family’s plan for him is very clear, he cannot stay in Xi’an, let alone go back to Pingcheng with Tang Yi.

The summer in Xi’an is very hot, and the campus of the Normal University is full of cypress pines.

Tang Yi and Li Bochuan were walking under the shade of the trees.

She wished him a bright future.

Li Bochuan stopped his steps: “Tang Yi.”

“Hmm?”

“Why did you agree to be with me in the first place?”

Tang Yi listed many reasons: “Being with you makes me very happy and comfortable.”

Li Bochuan asked in a low voice: “Very comfortable, very happy, but no love, right?”

Tang Yi was stunned for a moment.

She instinctively wanted to deny it, but Li Bochuan interrupted her with a smile: “No matter what the answer is, Tang Yi, these two years with you, I’ve also been very happy. Before, my life was very dull, but you’ve led me to understand many things I didn’t know before.”

Over these two years, he has changed a lot, no longer as cold and taciturn as before, and his friends all say he has become more warm-hearted.

He said: “Tang Yi, thank you.”

Li Bochuan once gave Tang Yi a proof.

Phenethylamine and dopamine are the hormones secreted during the period of passionate love, and the peak concentration of phenethylamine can last for about 6 months to 4 years.

By then, endorphins and oxytocin will turn the passionate love into eternal love after the fervent period.

What a pity.

He couldn’t wait for that moment.

On the day Li Bochuan left school, it was raining heavily in Xi’an.

Tang Yi and Chen Jiahe were in the internet cafe.

She saw a message about Li Bochuan on the campus website——

[I am a lonely island, and you are just a temporary lighthouse.

The lighthouse has had a brief light.

The island is still lonely.]

At the same time, Tang Yi received a text message from Li Bochuan on her mobile phone.

[I hope your phenethylamine, dopamine, endorphins and posterior pituitary hormones all exist because of one person. Goodbye.]

Tang Yi turned off her phone.

She was clearer than anyone else that this was an impossible thing.

There is someone playing music in the internet cafe.

“… Love is just a high fever, infatuation is the follow-up that doesn’t get better…”

Chen Jiahe took off his headphones, turned to look at Tang Yi, and comforted in a low voice: “Breakups are not a big deal, it’s like getting sick and having a fever, you will feel uncomfortable for a while, but you will eventually get better.”

“Yes.”

Getting over a breakup is not a big deal at all.

Moreover, long ago, Tang Yi had already realized that unrequited love is a form of heartbreak.

These past few years, she has rarely thought about Jiang Qiaosheng.

But fate is both merciful and cruel.

She to Li Bochuan, as Jiang Qiaosheng to her.

Just like the song says.

“Desire but cannot have, how do you deal with life.”

“Desire but cannot have, there are no wise people in love.”

---

The author has something to say:

Summer continues.

It’s been a while since the last update, so here’s a red envelope for everyone, thank you for reading.

Note 1: The content related to phenylethylamine, dopamine, endorphins, and vasopressin in the text has references and is based on online sources.

Note 2: “Love is just a high fever, infatuation is the follow-up that doesn’t get better.” “Desire but cannot have, how do you deal with life. Desire but cannot have, there are no wise people in love.” Are from Li Zongsheng’s “A Song for Myself”.